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Monday, April 19, 2010

Such negativity!

I am seriously feeling demotivated with my life right now... Some of my colleagues have tendered their resignations and they will be out by June... Me? Whenever someone asked what am I going to do next, I will shrugged. I myself don't have the answer right now. Sit and wait? Whenever I feel the urge to apply for a new position I will be left thinking... if I were to be the employer, would I be hiring me? I don't think so... at least not to the position I wanted to apply to...

I NEED a direction in life. Where can I find it? I feel LOST and so insecure right now... Feel STUPID and unloved... How do you do it? To be sure of something? I just don't know...

I don't find any real pleasures in life anymore... My life is as dull as it can be. Sure I have a loving husband, but sometimes I doubt that he understood me the way I wanted him to be. I have a loving family, but they are so far from me, I can't reach them as frequent as I wanted to. I have friends... but we all have our own journey to ride... What else is missing?

People starting to give comments of maybe I should just start a family and focus on them.. Sure, I would love that more than anything.. but they don't actually fall down from the sky do they? Why can't I just be happy?

1 comment:

memeljoan said...

Tu la namaya hidup kan ig?hmm, sa pun kadang2 ada perasaan mcm ko tu tp sekadar macam tu sajalah...berlalu pergi...well, now I'm trying to have a 'new person' in my life...:)